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Trump hilariously warns against 'wild and false allegations' after Russia indictments

Toby Lambert, February 16, 2018

Here’s the White House’s official response—or responses—on special counsel Robert Mueller’s Russia indictment. According to a statement from the press secretary:

Earlier today, Deputy Attorney General Rod Rosenstein announced indictments against 13 Russian nationals and 3 Russian entities for meddling in the 2016 Presidential election, which began in 2014 before the President declared his candidacy. President Donald J. Trump has been fully briefed on this matter and is glad to see the Special Counsel’s investigation further indicates—that there was NO COLLUSION between the Trump campaign and Russia and that the outcome of the election was not changed or affected. 

“We choose to see the fact that we are not directly implicated in one aspect of this investigation as total vindication, and la la la we can’t hear you talking about the investigation not being completed.” The statement continued:

President Trump says, “it is more important than ever before to come together as Americans. We cannot allow those seeking to sow confusion, discord, and rancor to be successful. It’s time we stop the outlandish partisan attacks, wild and false allegations, and far-fetched theories, which only serve to further the agendas of bad actors, like Russia, and do nothing to protect the principles of our institutions. We must unite as Americans to protect the integrity of our democracy and our elections.”

You mean “wild and false allegations” like “Just found out that Obama had my ‘wires tapped’ in Trump Tower just before the victory”? 

For a change, the White House communications office and Trump himself were on the same page:

x

Russia started their anti-US campaign in 2014, long before I announced that I would run for President. The results of the election were not impacted. The Trump campaign did nothing wrong – no collusion!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) February 16, 2018

Trump’s lawyers, who reports say have been trying to keep him from firing Mueller by assuring him the investigation will be over soon and he’ll be cleared, must be relieved that Mueller has bought them some room to breathe.

Politics

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